


Family Men

by westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist



Category: The West Wing
Genre: Children, F/M, Family, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-11-04
Updated: 2007-11-04
Packaged: 2019-05-15 15:53:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,815
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14793465
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist/pseuds/westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist
Summary: A tale of two families,





	Family Men

**Author's Note:**

> A copy of this work was once archived at National Library, a part of the [ West Wing Fanfiction Central](https://fanlore.org/wiki/West_Wing_Fanfiction_Central), a West Wing fanfiction archive. More information about the Open Doors approved archive move can be found in the [announcement post](http://archiveofourown.org/admin_posts/8325).

  
Author's notes:

CJ/Danny, CJ/OMC, Danny/OFC, alternate universe, total fantasy (or is it?)

 

 

 

Rating Adult - I don't know if it's smutty or erotic; I do know that it is explicit

 

 

 

Spoilers through end of series

 

 

 

Not mine, never were, never will be, but they consume my soul

 

 

 

Feedback and criticism always welcomed

* * *

_September 20, 2015; Kensington, CA mid-afternoon_

Paul Reeves looked at his family, standing around the dinner table. They, in turn, were looking at him, waiting for him to bless their Sunday dinner.

There was so much for which to thank God, but Paul knew that everyone was hungry; the pork roast had taken longer than expected. God will understand, he told himself.

“For the food you have given us to eat, we thank you, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Amen.”

Paul reached down to Caitlin, standing at her place to his right, and lifted her into her booster seat. Derrick pulled back CJ’s chair for her.

“Oops! I’m sorry, Deborah!”

Paddy had started to sit down, but remembered what Papa had told him. “Gentlemen pull out chairs for ladies.”

“Thank you, Paddy.” Deborah smiled at her little stepbrother as he held her chair. (She grasped the front of her chair to help as the first grader pushed on the back of the chair.)

Paul cut a slice from one end of the roast, then cut two more pieces. “Is this okay for now, sweetheart?” Paul put the meat on a plate and handed it to Deborah on his left. The plate was passed to CJ at the other end of the table.

One small slice was put on a second plate and passed to Derrick, who began to cut it into small pieces for Caitlin.

Ðeborah?” Paul smiled at the daughter who looked so much like her mother.

“The same as CJ, please.”

Her father complied.

Derrick was still busy with Caitlin’s plate, so Paul put one and a half pieces on a plate for Paddy. Then he cut the end from the other side of the roast (Derrick liked the end cuts), plus two more slices for the lawyer. Finally, he put a couple slices on the last plate, sliced a few more in case anyone wanted seconds, and took his seat.

Derrick picked up the platter of roasted new potatoes, onions, carrots, and zucchini chunks that had been cooked with the roast and offered the serving spoon to CJ, who served herself and put some potatoes, carrots, and zucchini in a small bowl, mashed and cut the vegetables, and set the plate on Dansha’s high chair tray.

Derrick took some vegetables for himself and Caitlin, passed the plate to Deborah (who held it for Paddy and then her father before serving herself).

As everyone began to eat, Paul prayed again, this time just to himself and the God to whom he had dedicated his life some thirty years ago.

“Thank you, Lord, for my family, for allowing us to have this experience.”

How many families, he wondered, still ate mid-afternoon Sunday dinner together? In how many other houses in this town was this scene, a scene thought to be more indicative of the middle of the last century, taking place?

Of course, it was not an exact reenactment of those idealized times.

“Excellent, Dad, as usual.”

Paul had done the cooking today, taking the roast from the refrigerator, putting everything in the pan, and seasoning it, setting the oven timer to reach 325 at forty-five minutes past noon, then covering the pan with foil and allowing the meat to reach room temperature while the family went to church.

When Paul had announced that the meal was ready, about a half hour ago, Derrick and Paddy had changed back to their dress slacks, but the three males were in nice cotton sweaters rather than coats and ties. Deborah had stayed in the matching tunic and slacks she had worn to church, but CJ, who had taken off the suit she had worn earlier in order to nurse Dansha, had put on a long patterned skirt and a color coordinated blouse.

But the table was set with their good china, flatware, and stemware, and they were using cloth placemats and napkins.

Still, it was nice to have everyone together.

Derrick had been coming by about two Sundays a month since he had moved into his San Francisco apartment in late July. However, since Deborah had moved into the family house in late August, her twin had been coming across the bay every Sunday, and this week, he had come over Saturday afternoon and spent the night with them.

Paul knew that Derrick’s increased presence was due to that of Deborah, and the father understood. The twins had been close since their conception, and while they would always have that special bond, Deborah’s upcoming marriage would bring a change to that relationship. Paul knew that Deborah and Derrick wanted to make the most of the next three months.

As did Paul.

Paul knew that under different circumstances, different things would be occurring, but he was glad that Deborah and Tom’s circumstances were such that Deborah had chosen to return to her father’s house for these last few months before her marriage.

In three months and one week, Deborah would wake up for the last time in her single bed across the hall from the master bedroom and put on her mother’s wedding dress. Paul would escort her down the aisle of the church and put her hand into Tom’s waiting one. Then he would don his ministerial stole and witness the vows binding together the two young people into a new family.

“It’s the way it should be,” he thought. He fully recognized that he was being extremely old-fashioned, in wanting Deborah under his roof but having no problem with Derrick living however much of a bachelor lifestyle that a first year associate in a major law firm could manage.

“CJ, I’ll be assisting Barry Demos on the Hollis Foundation project starting next week,” Derrick told his stepmother. “Do you have any advice, or inside information, on working with the Hollis legal staff?”

“Jamie Cleveland is a very good lawyer and a very good person. You’ll find it very easy to get along with her. Tommy Gans is okay, but he’s from Kentucky and can’t shut up about basketball. Tiffany Bacher has a very dry wit, a strange sense of humor; if you think she says something out line, she probably didn’t mean it that way. Will you be going down to San Luis Obispo or will they be coming here?”

“For this meeting, we’re driving down Monday afternoon, will stay there until Thursday morning.”

Deborah had been clearing the table and now she carried over the lemon roll and dessert plates from the credenza.

“Shall I serve?” she asked. Everyone enjoyed the dessert. Then Paddy asked if he and Derrick could be excused. His big brother was teaching him how to throw a football.

Ninety minutes later, Derrick came out the bedroom he shared with Paddy carrying a garment bag and a knapsack.

“I’ll see you all next week,” he announced as he began his farewell hugs.

“Don’t go.” Paddy grabbed onto his brother’s hand.

“Hey, buddy, I have to get ready to go on a trip tomorrow. I’ll be back soon.”

Paddy knew that he wasn’t a little kid anymore, he was in first grade; he was supposed to understand. Derrick had to spend much more time at his job than Mama and Papa had to spend at their jobs. For one thing, their jobs were different. For another, Derrick was in something called “competition” with some of the other people at his job. Papa said it was kind of like football and baseball players. There were more people who wanted to have the jobs than there were jobs to go around and the people in charge of the place where Derrick worked would only keep the best ones. When Paddy asked why they didn’t already know that Derrick was “the bestest”, Papa said that not everyone was as perceptive, whatever that was, as Paddy and that sometimes, things happened that seemed to be unfair. Paddy loved his brother and he wanted him to win the competition, so he didn’t make any more fuss about Derrick having to leave.

Once Derrick left, Mama and Papa said they needed to take a nap. (Mama and Papa took an awful lot of naps together. But when Paddy said something about it to Derrick, his brother just laughed and told him that sometimes, when you were a grownup, naps were a lot more fun than when you were a kid.) Deborah said that Paddy should come to the park with Caitlin, Dansha, and her. Paddy went, but he kicked at a lot of sticks and stones because he wanted Derrick to spend more time at home.

_September 26, early evening_

“Derrick!”

Paddy saw Derrick’s car in the driveway when they had come back from Mama’s church and tore through the garage and into the kitchen, looking for his brother.

Derrick Reeves got up from the kitchen table and picked up the child, who wrapped his arms around Derrick’s neck and his legs around Derrick’s waist.

“Hey, buddy!”

“I’m glad you’re here!”

“So am I! There’s something for you on my bed,” Derrick answered as he lowered the boy to the floor.

“Yay!” Paddy ran off to the bedroom wing.

“And some things for your sisters,” Derrick called after the boy. “Bring them back with you.”

“You shouldn’t spend all your money, son.” Paul shifted Caitlin to his left arm as he gave Derrick a one-armed hug.

“Jean-Luc used his faculty discount card, everything was half-price. And I just bought for the kids, I hope that’s okay.” The last sentence was aimed at his twin. Derrick was pretty sure that the lack of Cal Poly Mustang athletic wear would not cause irreparable emotional harm to his father and his stepmother.

“Derrick, your presence is my present.”

Everyone groaned at the trite (but true) statement.

“Derk! Kiss!” Caitlin held out her little arms to the young man and gave him a sloppy kiss, then clamored to be let down when Paddy returned to the kitchen, wearing one hoodie and carrying two others.

Finally CJ, having handed Dansha to her husband, came up to Derrick. “I love having you here with us, but I’m worried about your social life, and if you have one?”

“I manage fine on Friday nights,” Derrick told her as he returned her hug. “And maybe once in a while during the week, when I’m not working late.”

“How about Chinese takeout?” Deborah looked around the group.

“ _Pizza! Yay!” Cosmas, Damian, Danielle, Leslie, and Theo opened the boxes and grabbed for the slices._

“ _Old Bay shrimp!” Danny, Jem, and Hugh dug into the pile of crustaceans and washed down the luscious morsels with cold beer._

_Brianna and Alicia lifted their mimosas and savored the delicate slices of quiche garnished with fresh strawberries and slices of melon._

_Pistol walked from group to group; he was an omnivore and glad of it._

Two hours later, the four adults were sitting around the kitchen table, trying to convince each other that they should try to finish the three tablespoons each of leftover beef with pea pods, orange chicken, twice cooked pork, and Hunan shrimp. Caitlin and Dansha were sacked out; Paddy was on the phone with Maggie Muñoz, who just had to call to tell Paddy how she lost one of her teeth and how somebody called the Tooth Fairy took it but left her a whole dollar for it.

“The trip was okay?” CJ asked her stepson.

“It was wonderful.”

Derrick told them how much he liked San Luis Obispo and the Cal Poly campus. He really enjoyed his work with the Hollis Foundation legal staff. Everyone seemed to work together for the best interests of the foundation and its projects. There wasn’t any pushing and shoving to be the best; there wasn’t any tearing down of anyone else; there wasn’t any stealing of anyone else’s ideas. Mr. and Mrs. Hollis were very warm people and seemed genuinely interested in him as a person. Of course, they sent their love and their best to CJ. Mr. Hollis had said that he still had hopes that CJ would reconsider returning, if only part-time, or at least consider taking a position on the board. (“I keep telling him, maybe after I finish the degree work here, I mean, I just started the first of the two courses I need, and after the girls are older, of course.”) President and Mrs. Santos were very nice and very competent, but no one could hold a candle to your stepmother, Mr. Hollis told him.

“Bonnie, Jean-Luc, and the girls?”

“Send their love. Bonnie seems perfectly happy balancing her work and her family. Jean-Luc has a book on Sartre coming out next summer.”

_Later that evening_

“I guess Derrick is still having a bit of a rough time at the law firm?”

CJ walked into the master bath where Paul had just finished changing Dansha and was cleaning up the mess. (A few minutes ago, Derrick had come to the door. Paddy was complaining of a “tummy ache” and Derrick was wondering if he could give the little boy a couple of his Tums® . CJ wanted to make sure it was nothing more than that and had reassured herself that Paddy didn’t have a fever and didn’t react overmuch when she pressed on the general area of her son’s appendix.)

“I’m sure that he’ll adjust to it. He was quite competitive in high school, so I expect his ego will push him to succeed. In my mind, the real issue is that this is the first time he’s been with a lot of people every bit as quick, as good as he is.” Paul picked up Dansha and carried her to the crib.

CJ had only known Derrick for a little less than three years, and she knew that Paul had greater insight into the twins and their psyches, but she sensed that Derrick’s issues were more than just not being king of the hill. For one thing, there was that huge bottle of antacids in his overnight kit. For another, there was a bit of forced brightness in his voice. Then there was the brightness in his eyes as he talked about San Luis Obispo and the foundation’s legal team.

“ _CJ’s right,” Alicia told Danny. “My baby’s not in the right place for him.”_

“ _I don’t know, Lish. Paul’s right; Derrick needs to adjust to the new situation. When I started teaching, I had a few rough spots myself.”_

CJ remembered back four years, when Danny and the other guys were late coming back from their fishing trip. She hadn’t hesitated for one second before calling in favors, even though she would never do it for herself. I’ll call Frank in a few weeks, she thought to herself and smiled as she removed her sweater, dropped her skirt, opened her negligee drawer, and reached for the bronze sleep shirt that was on top of the pile.

“Don’t bother with that.”

CJ looked up at the sound of her husband’s order. She knew better than to jokingly wonder aloud about what would be the repercussions of putting on the garment. Paul didn’t play those games.

“ _She sure played them with me often enough!”_

“ _At least you got the chance.” Simon Donovan looked longingly into the bedroom in Kensington._

“ _Hey, guy, what can I say? I’m sorry, but then, if you hadn’t been shot, I might not have had my chance.”_

“ _Ah, well. Hey, the game is starting. I’ll take Cherubim by eight.”_

“ _No way those guys will beat the Seraphim.”_

_The two men settled down to watch the football game being played by the cluster of stars that Ptolemy had named Herakles._

Instead, she returned his smile with one of her own, walked her nude body over to him, and with one hand touching the side of his face, used the other to unsnap his 501s.

_October 20_

“Hey, Donna!” CJ curled up on the deck recliner and watched her daughters playing together in the sandbox.

“Hi, CJ! What’s up?”

“Just calling to tell you that you were looking damn good last night.”

“You saw it?” Donna had been featured in a “Nightly News” segment about where former Santos administration figures were now and what they were doing. Donna was shown attending a Stafford County Board of Supervisors meeting (she had been elected to fill a vacancy back in August.)

“Sure did. I loved the way you channeled the President when you denounced that one guy’s argument as a typical example of the ‘Post hoc ergo propter hoc’ fallacy,” CJ laughed.

“Poor man didn’t know what hit him.” Donna joined in the laughter. “So, how’s the return to work going? You’re taking a class, right?”

“It’s okay. I’m only in the office for three days a week, six hours a day. The class meets late Tuesday afternoon, 3:30 until 6:00. Paul’s home those afternoons, so it’s good.”

“Dansha does okay without you?”

“Yes, especially since I weaned her ten days ago.”

“I thought you were going to try to nurse for a full year?”

“Not the way that kid bites! I shouldn’t complain, it’s the only thing she does that even begins to annoy. She’s sleeping through the night now. Deborah keeps telling us to move the crib into the room she and Caitlin share, but it would be too crowded. But after December - ”

Donna thought she heard a twinge of sadness in her friend’s voice.

“You okay, Ceej?”

“I’m fine, it’s just that I’ve grown so close to Deborah, having her here, and soon she’ll be taking off for the land of twenty-four hour days and nights.

“However,” CJ’s voice brightened, “we’re having a good time wrapping up wedding details. Hank’s coming up the day after tomorrow to make sure that Alicia’s dress fits Deborah. It will be good to see him. He’s also doing my dress, updating that Armani with the light blue skirt and dark blue top.”

“ **Updating** an Armani?” Donna chucked.

“Hey, nothing’s perfect.”

“Mama!”

CJ looked up. Dansha was throwing sand.

“Gotta go. My love to Josh. Kiss the kids for me.”

“Ditto to Paul and ditto the rugrats, all five of them.”

_October 23_

“Why don’t you put these things in the refrigerator?”

“Okay, Papa. Could I visit Maggie when I have a school holiday?”

Paddy was happy and sad at the same time. Yesterday afternoon, Uncle Hank flew up from Santa Monica. He was going to fix Aunt Alicia’s wedding dress so it would fit Deborah when she got married right after Christmas. Uncle Steve, Pammy, and little Danny were s’posed to come too, but Pammy got sick so Uncle Steve and the kids stayed home. Uncle Hank was going to come by himself, but since Maggie didn’t have school and they had the extra ticket, Aunt Diana and Uncle Frank let her come too. Paddy got to take Maggie to school with him today for show and tell. But when Papa picked up the two of them after school, Uncle Hank was also in the car and they went to the airport. It was a short visit with his best friend “even bester than Derrick”.

“ _Will someone_ _ **please**_ _do something about my son’s grammar!” Danny shouted._

_Sister Mary Benedict told Danny to cut his son some slack. “Chill!”_

“ _Chill? From a nun?” Danny thought._

Paddy also learned some more rules about being a gentleman last night. (There were lots of rules, Papa said, and it would take some time to learn all of them. It was okay if he didn’t remember all the time; he just needed practice.)

First of all, Maggie didn’t know about waiting to have her chair pulled out, but Papa was very nice about it. (Caitlin was sitting on Papa’s left side because apparently one of the rules was that a lady guest sat on Papa’s right side and a gentleman guest sat on Mama’s left side, so Uncle Hank sat in Derrick’s place. Apparently, Uncle Hank knew the rules because he helped Mama with her chair. Also, apparently even a little kid like Maggie counted as a lady guest. Then, when Papa cut the roast beef, he gave the first piece to Maggie rather than Mama and the second piece to Uncle Hank, because guests get served before Mama. Paddy got served last (except for Papa, of course, cause he was cutting the meat.)

Sometimes, it seemed to Paddy that girls had all the fun, but Paddy was still glad he was a boy like Papa and Derrick.

Paul looked in on Caitlin and Dansha in the family room, (Caitlin was playing with her caveman doll; Dansha was slumbering in her cradle carrier) then went to find CJ and Deborah.

He hadn’t seen his wife and his daughter since this morning; it had been deliberate.

Paul did not want to see Deborah in Alicia’s dress and veil until right before the wedding. He had been telling the truth when he had told first Deborah and then CJ that he would be able to handle seeing his daughter in her mother’s dress. His emotions on that day, when he would be so happy for Deborah and yet more than just a little sad to be officially recognizing that there was another man in her life, would be heightened and he would be prepared to deal with them. Seeing the image of his virgin bride in her virginal bridal finery would be just one small part of that jolt to his composure. Seeing her in it today, when he was expected (at least in his mind) to be a rational adult was a different story.

He heard the voices coming from his bedroom.

“CJ, was it hard for you, with Danny, and then with Daddy, to let them take care of you? I mean, I’ve only been independent, if that’s the right word, for three years, and I was worried, am still a bit worried, about whether I can still be my own person while letting Tom take care of me the way he wants to take care of me. You were by yourself for so many years; you’ve achieved more than just about any woman in this country has, being Chief of Staff and all. Were you ever worried about being cramped?”

“Well, first of all, I think that Ella Grasso, Ann Richards, Dixie Lee Ray, Martha Layne Collins, and the other women who have been state governors might argue that they held more power than I did,” CJ laughed. “Second, when it’s right between him and you, it usually doesn’t seem like you’re being cramped.”

“But if it does?”

“Well, let me tell you what Abbey Bartlet told me. ‘Sometimes you kiss them, tell them that you love them, but that in this particular situation, you can take care of yourself. Once in a while, you tell them you can take care of yourself, but skip the kissing and telling them you love them part. And once in a while, you thank God that there is someone who wants to take care of things for you. The tricky part is knowing when to do what.’ I’ve found, over the past years, that it’s pretty good advice.”

“ **Did** you ever feel cramped with Danny? Does **Daddy** ever cramp you?”

Paul walked away as CJ started to tell Deborah about her initial arguments with Danny about her traveling for “Road to a Better World”. He didn’t feel as if he should eavesdrop on whatever CJ might choose to share with his daughter about their marital relationship. He wasn’t entirely convinced that “cramping” CJ was always a bad thing.

For example, once CJ decided that she did want to pursue her PhD, she (no surprise here) wanted "to get it overwith ASAP". She needed two classes and the dissertation and she figured she could take the two classes this fall plus begin work on the dissertation, then finish the work and defend it in time for next May's commencement ceremonies.

Paul told her that he felt she was taking on way too much. She was just starting back to work after nine months. It would be an adjustment not only for her but also for the children, especially Caitlin, who was still in the short-term memory stage. There was also Deborah's wedding. Granted, Deborah was here and could take on a great deal of the work, but Paul knew his wife -- she would want to continue to be involved. Then there was their relationship as husband and wife, emotional as well as physical. He and CJ both had enjoyed spending the extra time with each other since last December. They knew they would have to go back to work ("Unless I can convince you to live off our savings, we move up to Albion, and downsize our lifestyles," CJ joked), but they wanted to keep from working forty plus hour weeks. 

”Sweetheart, I really think you should just take one course this semester and one next semester. Do the dissertation next year and get the degree in ’17. I don’t want you overburdened and frazzled.”

”Donna managed two classes a semester, a full work week, and four kids. I can do this.”

He had to stop himself from saying “But you aren’t Donna”, but the truth was, she wasn’t. The fact that Donna was blonde, beautiful, and willowy, combined with the fact that she was a late bloomer, blinded long-time friends to Donna’s extraordinary ability. Also, Donna hadn’t been through CJ’s life – eight years of deferred emotional feelings for the man she loved, losing another man to violent murder, taking care of Jed Bartlet while everyone else went off to find a successor for the man or, in the case of Toby Ziegler, decide that innate morality demanded the commission of civil disobedience. He had best be as tactful as possible.

”CJ, Donna was starting her Master’s work from the very beginning. Also, the department may want more than two semesters ‘in residence’, as it were – the perceived difference, and accompanying deference between a master’s and a doctorate is so much more than that between a bachelor’s and a master’s. Sweetheart, I know you can do anything you set your mind to do, but I want you happy and unstressed. Please? For me?”

Finally, thank God, she agreed to do it “your way, husband and master” and so far, she seemed to be handling everything with balance and confidence.

_”Like I told you, she needs restraints at times. The trick is to make her see it. You’re doing okay,” Danny said_.

Paul would be officiating at his daughter’s wedding but there was no way he was going to conduct the pre-marital counseling for the engaged couple. Tom had come down for two days right after Deborah had left Princeton and Paul introduced them to one of his colleagues at the Pacific School of Religion. The man was counseling the two of them via phone and web cam and Paul was sure that his daughter and his future son-in-law were in good hands.

Of course, if Deborah were to ask his advice on something specific (but, he hoped, **not** something sexual), he would do his best.

And, of course, Paul was glad that CJ and Deborah were becoming so comfortable with each other. In so many cases, stepparents and stepchildren of the same sex were at odds with each other.

When Deborah came to Kensington, CJ asked her if she was really okay with sharing a room with Caitlin. Was she sure she didn’t want to use the living room instead? With the new curtains on the French doors and other additions, it was a private room. The only problem would be the distance to the bathroom. However, Deborah assured CJ that she was fine with the room she had used for the past two years.

CJ also insisted that Deborah was not to think of herself as “built-in child care”. On the days when both CJ and Paul were on campus, the girls were in daycare. And either CJ or Paul was off duty by the time Paddy’s school let out for the day. Deborah was to plan her wedding and work on her dissertation. CJ had even found Deborah some office space on campus so she would have a “professional” place to do her work.

On the mornings when either Paul, CJ (or both) were at home, the adults would have a relaxing time with each other. (CJ and Paul did accept Deborah’s offer to take turns getting Paddy to and from school, mostly because Paddy was so proud of “my really pretty big sister” and wanted his friends to see her.)

“I know you would want to be here, I know that Deborah would want you here, and you can’t have any doubt about the way I feel,” Paul said to the presence he thought he felt, the faint scent of “Youth Dew” he sensed in the air, “but I hope you don’t mind that our daughter has someone to help her, to be the feminine sounding board I can’t.”

“ _Of course I don’t mind! I’m happy for all of you! And I hope you don’t mind that – Danny, stop it! Not in front of everyone! – Leslie, Theo, and I have a man to help us up here. In a sense, we’re making our own little blended family. Look, I’ve got to go work on the costumes for all five kids, plus think of something for Pistol. Maybe put some white dots on him and let him be a reverse Dalmatian.”_

_Danny reflected that They were really in tune with what people in heaven might like. For the most part, wishing did indeed make it so, but They knew that sometimes, people enjoyed the “doing”. So Alicia was doing arts and crafts things to make costumes for the kids rather than having them materialize out of thin air. Yesterday, for dinner, Danny got to actually cook the steaks for the eight of them (counting Pistol), Brianna, Jem, Hugh, his folks, CJ’s folks, and Alicia’s mother and grandmother. (Of course, when Esther made the potato salad, she was perfectly happy with not having to peel the spuds or to chop the celery and scallions. And the kids enjoyed wishing the dishes clean.)_

After CJ finished telling Deborah about how she came to accept Danny’s “going all Victorian about cabs and stuff” she changed the subject. She didn’t want to discuss her current situation.

“It’s amazing how little alteration you’ll need for your dress.”

“I know. Aunt Gwen says that I’m so much like Mom that it sometimes gives her a start. When she gave me the box, she said that until Mom started losing weight from her cancer (Deborah’s voice wavered a bit), she probably could have stepped right into the dress herself.”

“I wish I could say that. I’m about six pounds over what I weighed two years ago, and ten pounds over what I weighed when Danny and I got married.”

“I don’t know, CJ, you look about the same to me; maybe it’s muscle. Where’s the thing you wore two years ago?”

CJ dug into the back of the walk-in closet and found the ivory lace suit. She tried on the pieces.

Deborah was right; she could still wear it.

“Well, there is some elastic in the waist band,” CJ laughed.

“Where’s your other dress?”

It was in a box on the top shelf of her side of the closet. Deborah wheedled until she got down the box and unwrapped the dress from its covering.

“My Lord, look at all those buttons! (Alicia’s dress had a zipper down the back.) Well, it’ll take forever to undo them and do them up again, but let’s see.”

CJ showed her the side zipper that would make it easy to try on the dress and take it off again.

“Here goes nothing.”

There was just an iota of tightness at the waist. She also had a bit more fullness, more cleavage up top.

“Maybe I gained most of the weight on the inside of my thighs.”

“Did Danny undo all these?”

“Yep.”

CJ told her about the conversation before Carol’s wedding. They giggled about Rick not bothering to undo Ginger’s dress and laughed out aloud at the thought of Josh and Velcro ® .

“Sweetheart, do you want me to start – oh!”

Paul opened the bedroom door, started to walk in, then stopped short.

“CJ, you are so beautiful.”

Even when he had been sick two Christmases ago, Deborah had never heard her father’s voice sound so hoarse, so throaty, so deep. Deborah knew that the husband and wife saw only each other, did not remember that there was a third person in the room.

Deborah slipped out of the room. She called next door to Lee and Dottie Hotchkiss. Yes, they could take care of Dansha for a couple of hours, so Deborah gathered up some baby food and the ever-present diaper bag. She phoned the restaurant to inquire about call ahead seating. It was early, the wait was only twenty-five minutes. Deborah wrote a note for her father and CJ, then gathered up everyone. “Let’s go Outback tonight.”

Paul approached CJ, who stood, seemingly frozen by his stare. He pulled her into his arms, kissed her face, her neck, the tops of her breasts that rose above the neckline of the dress.

“A vision of beauty. An angel in lace,” he murmured over and over again, grasping the back of her head with his right hand, the curve of her backside with his left, as she moaned and hung onto his shoulders.

Then he turned her round, holding her by the waist with his left arm. He moved aside her hair, kissed the back of her neck and started down her spine until he reached the neckline. His right hand went to the first button.

**_“No!”_ **

Paul didn’t know if CJ heard the anguished cry, but he stopped cold and dropped his hands. (Then he reached out to steady CJ, but let go again as soon as he was sure she wouldn’t fall.)

CJ turned around to see the tears in his eyes.

“I’m sorry; please forgive me, sweetheart. I’ll get Deborah to help you. I just can’t – this dress, and you in it; that belongs to Danny.”

He turned and left the room.

“ _I’m sorry, Jeannie,” Danny whispered. “I’ve accepted Paul in your life, his hands on you, his mouth on you, his body inside you. Hell, I wanted it for you and I’m glad that the two of you are so passionate about each other, both physically and emotionally. But this dress, that night in Santa Barbara, they’re_ _ **mine**_ _.”_

Paul found the note on the kitchen table and cursed. Deborah had taken Paddy and Caitlin for an early supper. He sat at the table for a few minutes, trying to get hold of his emotions, headed back to the bedroom, took a deep breath, and entered.

“Sweetheart, I’m sorry, Deborah’s taken the kids - ”

She was out of the dress; it was nowhere to be seen. She was standing in her bra and panties, a shift in her hand.

“The dress had a side zipper.”

He saw the trace of wetness on her face, tracks to match those on his cheeks.

Then they were in each other’s arms, crying again and kissing away each other’s tears.

“I never got to undress a bride,” he told her. “You went ahead and changed into your negligee without asking, so I put on the pajamas. I understood; I knew from before that you wanted to get the anxiety out of the way. And I knew why Alicia felt **she** had to assert herself, to take the initiative. When Alicia and I got back from Bermuda, I was going to ask her to put on her dress, but her damned mother, excuse me, her mother, had already had it cleaned and packed away.”

There had been no way that Paul was going to spend his first night with Alicia in the same town as Bernice and therefore had made the plans to go into the city. It was almost as if Bernice could read his mind; he swore he could see glee in her eyes when he found out that Alicia would be changing from her fairytale dress into a suit (a very nice, very feminine suit, to be sure, but not the completely appropriate lace and satin garment Alicia wore when they pledged themselves to each other) before leaving the Princeton Faculty Club. (“It’s the proper thing, Paul. You can’t expect her to ride for an hour in her veil and gown. Trust me, it’s just not done!”)

“I had no right, CJ. I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay,” CJ reassured her husband. “I shouldn’t have put it on. Deborah kept pressuring. I’m not blaming her; she just doesn’t understand. Hopefully, nothing will happen to Tom and she won’t ever have to understand. And on our wedding night, I had always wondered about wearing a sexy nightgown. I should have asked, I'm sorry.”

She babbled on until Paul stopped her --kissing her the way Danny did rather than tickling.

They continued to console and reassure each other until consolation and reassurance morphed into passion and desire.

“I love you, CJ, whatever you wear, or don’t wear.” Paul lowered his hand to her groin and spoke the words that could start her senses reeling. “Open wide for me, sweetheart.”

Later, it was their turn to leave a note on the kitchen table (after checking with the Hotchkiss’ to make sure that everything was okay with Dansha) and slip away to a little place on University Ave. It had changed hands a couple of times since their days at Berkeley, but it was still special to them.

At dinner, Paul told CJ that he had made reservations in Calistoga (“Of course, the same place!”) for the first weekend in November as a second anniversary celebration.

_October 31_

“No! Both of you go with Paddy and Caitlin! Deborah and I will take care of Dansha and give out the candy here.”

Derrick pushed Paul and CJ toward the door where Paddy (in a kilt with a sword) and Caitlin in “Pebbles” costume (“dress like Durk”, she had insisted, pointing to her caveman doll) waited impatiently to start collecting their stash of refined sugar, chocolate, fast food certificates, dimes (and maybe a toothbrush or two.)

Paul and CJ stood on the sidewalk, laughing as Paddy instructed his sister on the fine art of trick or treating.

“You have to say ‘Trick or Treat, please!’ and hold your bag wide open. Oh, and always say ‘Thank you!’ even if you don’t like what they give us. Be sure to say it to Mrs. Dixon. She gives you another piece if you say it.”

Later that evening, with the young beggars asleep (CJ and Paul told them “Only two pieces tonight and no chocolate!”), Derrick told the others about his law firm’s Halloween party the previous night. (“I was a pirate, one of about five,” he laughed.)

CJ still sensed that Derrick wasn’t too happy with his position, but noticed that he was very enthusiastic about his continuing work with the Hollis Foundation.

Deborah told them that Tom had called while they were out. The good news was that he would be able to come into town two days before Christmas instead of on Christmas Eve. One of the other interns took pity on the groom to be. The bad news was that he had to trade away his two days off the Monday and Tuesday after Thanksgiving.

“So I’ll be here after all, if it doesn’t upset Gina’s mother’s food count.”

CJ assured her that Carmella, Gina, and great-aunt Sophia didn’t know the meaning of “too many people to feed”.

_November 6; late afternoon_

Paul looked at the two children standing in front of him.

“Now do you promise that you will listen to Deborah and Derrick?”

“Yes, Papa,” Paddy said.

“Me, too.” Caitlin shook her head up and down emphatically.

“Then give me a hug.” Paul opened his arms.

“Will you bring us presents?” Paddy asked his Papa.

“We’ll be fine, Dad.”

Derrick had taken off the afternoon and would also take off Monday. Paul was glad that there would be an adult male in the house while he and CJ were gone.

“So as soon as your mother is ready, we’ll be - ” Paul stopped as CJ came into the family room. She was wearing the ivory lace suit she had worn on their wedding day.

CJ smiled at Paul.

Paul smiled at CJ.

“I’ll be five minutes.” Paul headed toward the bedroom.

Six minutes later, Paul returned. If you looked closely, the bow tie was just a tad uneven, and one of the studs on the tuxedo shirt wasn’t quite right, but he had even put on his black patent shoes and black socks. (His slacks, loafers, and seven-button Henley were in his left hand.)

“Have fun!” Deborah said (and blushed).

“Be good!” Paddy kissed his mama.

“Or at least careful!” Derrick joked as Paul opened the passenger door of the Mustang for CJ, walked around the rear of the car, and finally drove off toward Vallejo and points north.

_Ninety minutes later_

“Will there be anything else, Dr. Reeves,” the desk clerk said as she handed keycards to Paul.

“Would you ask dining services to wait for my call before bringing the meal?” Paul said quietly to the young woman.

“Of course,” she smiled. “Todd will show you to your suite.”

The bellman pushed the luggage cart toward the elevator bank. “If you’ll just follow me.”

A few minutes later, Todd opened the door to the suite and pushed the cart through the door.

“I’ll just show you a few things,” he said, then turned around as he realized that his guests were not in the room with him.

Paul picked up CJ and carried her across the threshold.

“Oh! Newlyweds?”

“Eternally,” CJ said. Paul and CJ laughed, fairly sure that the young man did not know of the line from Erich Segal’s “Love Story”.

“ _Don’t!” Danny said. “Remember, the Ali McGraw character dies!" He was still Celtic; he still feared evil, even in heaven._

Paul lowered CJ and smiled at the bellman.

“I think we can find everything.” He slipped Todd a ten dollar bill.

“Thank you, sir!”

As the door closed behind Todd, CJ smiled at Paul.

“Hi.”

“Hi there.” Paul slipped off his shoes and his jacket, undid his tie.

“Stop there,” CJ told her husband.

“Oh?”

“Oh.” She came up to him and kissed him.

“As I recall, I did this.” He picked her up again and carried her into the other room, where the bed had already been turned down by the chamber staff.

This time, the little buttons were on the front of the garment. This time, no one objected when Paul’s hand began to undo them.

Garment followed garment until they stood naked in the late afternoon sunlight that came through the sheers. His lips started on her brow, then moved to each eye. Down the bridge of her nose, past her lips, down her throat and the valley between her breasts. He sat on the edge of the bed as his mouth trailed down her stomach, then fell to his knees as he circled her navel, the faint line that reached toward her curls. She put her hands on his shoulders for support as he finally reached her center.

He rotated the two of them, so that she backed against the bed. Pulling at her waist, he indicated that it was her turn to sit. He lifted her legs over his shoulders and she shrieked as she quaked into his mouth, her head collapsed on his left shoulder.

When she had quieted, he rose from his knees. She shifted back on the bed and wrapped her legs around his waist as he lowered himself over her and into her warmth and tightness. Somehow, he managed to keep himself in check until he had made her ready again; he followed her a second later.

Afterward, he placed a quick call while she started the shower then joined her under the waterfall. She was drying her hair when the knock came, so he quickly slipped on his robe, opened the door, and then quickly slipped it off again when the door closed again.

When she entered the living room of the suite in her peach nightgown, she found him, as she expected, in his while silk pajama pants.

She didn’t expect the meal; she had mentioned that the paper had given the resort’s restaurant an excellent review and he had (she thought) nodded his head in agreement.

This time, there was shrimp, crab, and lobster meat to accompany the fettuccine. This time, the salad was designer lettuce instead of red and green leaf. This time, the champagne was her brother’s finest, with the words “naturally fermented in this bottle” rather than “charmat bulk process” on the label. This time, the plates were bone china and not Corelle ®, the cutlery was sterling (or plated) rather than stainless, and the stemware was Baccarat instead of Pier One glassware.

The first time, they were happy and secretly relieved. This time they were happy and cognizant of how lucky they were.

They made love a second time. Afterward, as she slept in his arms, he thought of their life together, of their children. Two years ago, he had hoped that “yours” and “mine” would become “ours” and it had happened. Two years ago, he had no idea that “ours” would grow by one little girl.

They had become a family.

In a few weeks, the family would change. Deborah would bring someone else into the circle, but also take part of herself out of the circle, to become part of Tom’s family, and to make a new family with Tom, and someday, God willing, their children. Someday, Derrick would find love, and, in turn, so would Paddy, Caitlin, and Dansha.

“ _Don’t forget about us. We’re all in this together.”_

“Good night, Danny. Good night, Alicia.”

_Danny and Alicia looked at the five children playing with Pistol and the newly healthy pit bulls at Rainbow Bridge._

“ _I think the kids are okay for a while,” Danny said as he pulled Alicia toward Cassiopeia’s Chair and began to dance circles around her._


End file.
